


The Candy Rat

by TabiKittyKat



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Day 13/25, F/M, FAHC, Fem! Jack, Fluff, Team OG
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-14
Updated: 2019-12-14
Packaged: 2021-02-18 10:37:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21792931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TabiKittyKat/pseuds/TabiKittyKat
Summary: Geoff eats candy meant for the Lads but tries to hide it.Jack wants the truth and she’s gonna get it.
Relationships: Jack Pattillo/Geoff Ramsey
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10





	The Candy Rat

R  
Jack returned to the penthouse from a day of Christmas shopping. She made the crew promise to not do any crimes during the holiday season because ‘tis the season for kindness and they’d have time to do all that next year. She ran the doorbell as best she could with all the shopping bags in her hands. 

Geoff opened the door and immediately took some bags off her hands. “Did you buy the whole mall?” he joked. 

“Very funny, Geoff. By the way, these aren’t your gifts so don’t get too excited. I actually bought some toys for the charity drive down the street.” Jack replied, making her way to the living room. Geoff followed her and started to take out various toys out of the bags. He gave Jack a kiss on the cheek and sat on the couch. 

“Good ol’ Jack; always helping others. That’s why I love ya.” Geoff smiled. 

“I thought you loved me for my expert driving skills.”

“Also for how hot you are, but we’re getting off track here.”

Jack chuckled and took out a bag of candy from her shopping bag. It was filled with various treats, all the way to the top. 

Geoff gasped and made “gimme” motions with his hands. 

Jack slapped his hands and held the candy away. “No! These are for the lads. I promised I’d get them some candy to have for dessert. So I filled up a bag with their favorites. You don’t touch!”

Geoff whined. “Aw come on!”

“No, Geoff! I’ll get you candy next time. Now I’m gonna get the wrapping paper and tape out of my room. Can you help me wrap these toys?”

“I’m crap at wrapping presents but sure.” Geoff shrugged. 

Jack smiled with gratitude and walked back to her room...after she put the bag of candy down. 

Uh-oh. 

Geoff waited. He looked around as soon as he was sure Jack was out of sight. 

“I’m gonna eat Gavin’s pieces first...” he grinned, tearing the bag open. 

One by one, he started eating the candy, commenting on how good they were or judging why the lads liked certain ones. 

He was in candy heaven. 

“Hey, Geoff!” Jack called from her room. 

Geoff cleared his throat and put the rest of the bag in his pocket. “Y-yes, dear?”

“I ran out of tape. Can I borrow some from you?”

“Y-yeah, sure! Take what you need!” Geoff replied, his voice getting high-pitched towards the end. 

“Thanks! Love ya lots!”

Geoff blew kisses in her general direction and continued to eat the candy. Soon enough, the bag was empty and he sighed. He wished for more but knew his stomach couldn’t handle what he did already. 

Jack soon returned with 3 rolls of wrapping paper and some tape. 3 rolls ended up being too much and she dropped the blue snowman patterned roll. “Oops!”

“I got it” Geoff went to pick it up, the red, empty bag of treats slowly floating to the ground. 

Jack gasped and snatched the wrapping paper from Geoff. “Geoff Lazer Ramsey! Did you eat all the candy I was saving for the boys?!”

“N-no! Why would I do that when you told me not to? There must be a rat in here or something that took all the candy!”

Jack looked down and noticed candy wrappers by Geoff’s feet. But she didn’t say anything. Instead, she had a better plan. 

She instead took out her cellphone and went to speed dial. 

“Everything okay, Jack?” Geoff asked, a hint of worry in his voice. 

“Oh sure. It just sucks that the candy is all gone. Now I gotta deliver the bad news.”

Jack waited a few seconds until the call finally went through. She put it on speaker and then Geoff heard who she was calling. 

_”Hello? You have reached Vagabond, the ruthless killer of the Fake AH Crew. Who am I killing and how can I do it for you?”_

Geoff went pale. 

“Hey, Ryan! It’s Jack. How are you and the lads doing?” Jack asked with a smile. 

_“Oh! Hey, Jack. We’re doing okay. It’s hard keeping these guys under control at the grocery store but the candy you promised them is keeping them in line, so thank goodness for that. By the way, you got me some too, right?”_ Ryan muttered that last part. 

“Of course I did! I know about your sweet tooth. But, the candy is why I’m calling you. Umm, someone ate your candy.”

 _“....what.”_ Ryan growled. 

Jack sighed and shook her head. “Some rat apparently ate your candy. I’m sorry.”

 _”Who do I kill and how do you want me to do it?”_ Ryan asked quickly. 

Geoff was sweating bullets at this point. 

“I don’t know, Ryan. Geoff saw the thief so you’d have to ask him.”

 _“And he let them take our candy?! That’s almost as bad as letting a thief take my Diet Coke! I know what must be done...”_ Ryan called back to the lads. _“Hey, lads! Someone took our candy so let’s get some candy here instead. And how about we get it the fun way?”_

Geoff could hear various cheers from the lads in the background, which switched to gunshots, shouts and various swear words filling the air in seconds flat. 

Ryan spoke into the phone one last time before he hung up. _”We’ll deal with the candy thief later. No one fucks with our full sized candy bars.”_

Geoff was visibly shaking at this point. 

Jack hung up with a sigh and looked at Geoff with a smile. “Well. That’s taken care of. Let’s start wrapping-“

“IT WAS ME! I’M SORRY! DON’T LET RYAN KILL MEEEE!!” Geoff sobbed. 

Jack smirked and patted him on the head a couple times. “I know you did it. I just wanted to get it out of you. Now you have the honor of explaining to the boys what you did and getting them more candy. Got it?”

“Y-yes, dear.” Geoff whimpered. 

They then started to wrap gifts while Geoff learned a valuable lesson that day. 

Don’t mess with Jack Pattillo. 

Or full-sized candy bars.


End file.
